To say the least, I’m in a funk right now, I have been since we returned from Africa in early June. I'm staying up too late, I'm sleeping in, and once I do get up, I tend to do very little with my day, as evidenced by the sudden lack of posting on this site (part 4 on Africa is coming). Even though I don't have a call as a pastor right now, there's plenty I could be doing. I have books to read for my Doctor of Ministry classes, some other pastors and I are working on a sermon / devotional series on the Apostles' Creed, there are a slew of projects that I could be developing, and I have this incredible opportunity to spend time with my family. But even with all of those possibilities, well, let's just say it isn't pretty.

So, about a month ago, I was reading through my RSS feeds and I ran across a post from Donald Miller, talking about an opportunity to win a trip for two to his Living a Better Story seminar (this post is our entry in the contest). Here's an overview:

Living a Better Story Seminar from All Things Converge on Vimeo.

Given my current funk I thought just trying to submit something would be helpful in a variety of ways:

• it would give me something to work on that had a clear due date
• given that our life stories are intertwined, I thought Anita and I could work on this together, which would double as some quality time and create some healthy conversations
• most importantly, because of the nature of the seminar, it could really help in getting my life on track by helping me find some clear direction

As Don explains in the video, the seminar is an extension of a book he wrote called, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years". As I read up on the book, I discovered that it is Don's story of how he broke through a funk and found himself in a place where he was living a great story. Given where I am, it seemed like a good place to start, so I ordered the book and read through it in about three days. Then I ordered the audio version (which includes some stories not in the book) so Anita and I could listen to it while on a road trip. Then Anita read the book and we talked about how it impacted each of us. In my case, I realized that there's more to my funk than being back from Africa and not having a job. Here's a few thoughts:

• My life has really just been a series of memorable scenes. We just spent five months in Africa, I've been a keynote or sectional presenter at a slew of conferences and special events, and I've done a ton of traveling because people wanted my opinion and advice. I've done all kinds of cool stuff that's resulted in those big moments where everybody stands in awe and then later on your name gets mentioned because, well, you've got memorable scenes. The problem is, the real story is what happens between those moments ... and that's where my life's been lacking. It's like my life has all the dots, but no lines connecting them to make a picture.
• I haven't finished anything. A church plant in downtown Denver, the follow-up on The Elemental Life, the fshbwl, glocal family, and I'm sure there are a plethora of other projects that haven't been finished, or done as well as they should have been. It's hard to live a great story when nothing gets done.
• My narrative arc is weak. I think this is part of the reason behind the other two points. I don't finish because I don't have a focus, an end, a bigger picture that I'm working towards. Instead, I get caught up in the thrill of starting something and the glory of those memorable scenes. I find myself living out of those experiences rather than working towards and completing something. I have great ideas, a multitude of skills, and an amazing network of connections, but I have never pulled them all together to tell a really great story. I need a narrative arc so I stop wandering aimlessly from project to project and memorable scene to memorable scene.

Now, I should pause and emphasize the word "weak", as in, "my narrative arc is weak", because there is something there, it just needs to be shaped, refined, and sharpened. And since reading the book, Anita and I have been trying to work with what we do have and move forward with purpose. For example, we recently made the really difficult decision not to move to Africa full-time because we believe our narrative arc involves helping individual Christians and congregations to be, well, what I describe here. Moreover, that's something we've already started at many levels, and rather than say I quit something else, I'd like to think the project has just been delayed.

What struck me as interesting, is that Anita's response to the book, while very different from mine, blends right in with this narrative arc, but where my focus has been on the pastoral side, for Anita, it's about how we live it as a family, and truth be told, if we can't live it, we can't lead others in doing it. For example:

• Getting fit. While listening to Don talk about the fitness journey that lead to his hiking the Inca Trail and riding his bike across America, Anita was inspired to start working out again and has recommitted herself to running a marathon before she turns 40. Moreover, knowing that I have back issues, she recently grabbed a pilates video aimed at developing core strength and declared that we should work on it together. This ties directly into our Christian calling of caring for our bodies (and what we do with our bodies and how we care for them is a place where Christians can and should stand out in the world).
• Revamping glocalfamily.com. While Anita's decided that she's not enough of a talker to do a podcast, she has a plethora of ideas on parenting, relationships, creation care, health, and other topics, so she's plotting out how to revamp the site and use it as a means to not only share our story, but invite others to join us in life that serves the greater good. Again, it's us living it and then placing our lives out there as a way to serve others.
• Stop playing it safe. Anita is a fantastic singer, and when I tell people that, most of the time they think I'm biased and bragging, and while I might be, when they hear her, they realize that my accolades will never do her voice justice. Seriously, we're talking a professional musician, a "she should be recorded" type of singer. However, outside of churches and a few weddings, nobody's ever heard her. She loves music, she wants to make use of her amazing gift, but she's been fearful of stepping out. Her corners of the world are safe, but making full use of her talents means taking risk. Again, how many Christians spend their lives playing it safe, and in the process, deny the world the gifts God has given them to bless others?

At this point, I think you get the basic idea, and while I see the big picture and Anita looks at the details, when you put us together there's one story there, one narrative arc, just waiting to be discovered and lived. We have a ton of potential and make a great team, the problem is, we often lack a unified and clear  story that's going somewhere and brings all of the pieces of our lives together. It would be great if the Living a Better Story Seminar would help us unearth our narrative so we could move along the arc together. We'd love to hear your thoughts about the story we're trying to figure out, the story you're living in, or whatever else you thought about while reading this post.